I'm about 34 weeks this week, so only about a month (maybe a bit more) left to go before princess Allison makes her debut. I'm attempting to do a VBAC after having two prior cesarean sections. I've never given birth vaginally before, but I feel like I've read every book that was ever written on what to expect. I did go through early and a bit of active labor with my youngest, in an attempted VBAC. I know what those later contractions feel like, though not the ones close to transition. I'm not nervous about the pain at all. I've watched and read every birth story I could get my hands on. I feel like I've researched and prepared how to sky-dive, and watched endless skydiving videos, but once you're up there in the plane about to jump, you can't help but feel nervous, anxious, and afraid. I'm not actually afraid of the pain. I've experienced pain outside of childbirth, on many occasions, and I'm fine with it. I'm not afraid o...
If you've never read this, you totally should. It's so true, it hurts. The woman finds her husband to be distant and acting strange, and takes every late response or quiet moment as something wrong. She blames herself for his distracted behavior. I don't know about you, but I've been this woman before. In the beginning of my relationship to my husband, Joey, there were often times when he'd be distant and distracted. I always thought it was something that I did wrong. It was hard, at first, for me to accept that "babe it's not you, I promise" was really true. I always blamed myself. Maybe it was just me being self-conscious, but whatever it was, I was putting a lot of blame on my own shoulders. Because of that, I would get upset. And because I was upset, he'd be upset that I was upset and he didn't understand why. It was a never-ending loop of crap. One day I found this hilarious meme, a diary entry of...